Expectations..

funny how sometimes something someone does can affect you so deeply, whether positively or otherwise, and the person who made you feel this way has ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA that they've made (or spoilt) your day..

thats why i guess its bad to carry baggage in life. cos if you're baselessly hanging on to something , whats the point? waste of time if you ask me.. but as always, easier said than done.

like the other day.. this person did something totally unexpected and that (almost) made my day. and the best part was that it put a smile on my first for most of the day and this person didnt even know. and today someone did something that shouldnt be affecting me in the least (well maybe a little), and yet my whole afternoon went downhill because of that.. i think its all about expectations actually - what you expect from others. if you have no expectations and take people as they come, life will be much easier to live. and i know very few people who are like that. i suppose we all have diff expectations towards diff people and when its not met, we tend to.. i dont know.. get disappointed and end up making assumptions i suppose (for want of a better way of putting it)..

you should only have high expectations of yourself cos it will strive to make you a better person, but start thinking "should" and "should not" with regard to other people and you're setting yourself up for disappointment. and as i said - easier said than done, cos i knew this a long time ago and i'm still struggling..

one of my favourite phrases: "the world is like a fruitcake, it wouldnt be complete without a few nuts in it" and this can be pretty helpful when kept in mind. like when someone cuts in front you when you're doing 140. or worse, when someone stays on the right lane while doing 110! yeah, its always down to perspective. like hermione once said (and i think this was one of her more famous phrases): "you could get us killed, or worse, expelled".. yeah, perspective is a funny thing. like nature or nurture. or flight or fight. its all up to the individual and his take on the world around.. oh well..

i've been trying (HARD), to base my happiness on whats inside. becos outside influences are unpredictable and if your mood were to follow, say, the weather for example, you'd have a tough time every morning if it rains. like today.. i mean, it was such a gloomy day. was raining when i got up and that made me wanna sink into bed further (which was not a good option), so i forced myself out. drove in the freaking rain, the bloody highway was jammed in 3 places and there was a chain accident involving 6 cars. came to the office and it was still gloomy. realised that i dont hv to feel this way cos i should be in control of how i feel, the weather shouldnt be having that privilege.. but was in a foul mood so lets forget that..

been blowing my nose and sneezing all day and now my whole face is swollen and my eyes hurt.
and bloody liner trade is due on Wed and i still havent even looked at the question! gonna be another sleepless night.. sigh.. and again..

oh my gawd.. just realised that my blog doesnt even contain ONE smiley face.. i must really be feeling like crap..

quick sayang, think of something nice. the rain (nope), my digicam's cable is missing (nope), my asgmtn is not done (nope), no futsal tmrw (nope), foosball table is spoilt (nope), tons of pending bookings (nope).. i give up. no smileys today then. and here's to hoping tmrw will be a better day starting of with sunshine ;-).. ahhhhhh.. there you go ;-)